RED Scout

CHARACTER

» Name: Scout (RED)
» Fandom: Team Fortress 2
» Reference:
Main: http://tf2wiki.net/wiki/Scout
Character Video: http://tf2wiki.net/wiki/Meet_the_Scout
Character Lines: http://tf2wiki.net/wiki/Scout_responses
Meet the Spy (shows the way Scouts are expected to act, at least; also Scout's mom): http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ZTj6tauY1JU
» Canon Point: Anywhere, it doesn't really make a difference.
» Gender: Male.
» Age: 18.

» Orientation: There's zero canon about this. TF2 characters exist in their own little space that's RED base and BLU base, and women kind of don't exist in the game except for being mentioned in passing (i.e. Scout's mom). Scout does fit the "homophobic straight guy gamer" stereotype in pretty much every way and is EXACTLY the type of guy to obnoxiously wolf-whistle at girls when they walk down the street... but then, he also willingly goes to live (possibly forever. I mean seriously, think about this, FOREVER.) in a base with a bunch of other older, heavier, definitely male men, so. Let's go with nominally straight (nominally because -- c'mon, 18 year old hormonal boy + no sex in years, how hard would it be to turn him on, woman or not?) though if he liked dudes, he'd probably only like the manly ones. But he doesn't. Ok? Because he ain't a fag. And he's totally not insecure about this like your average teenage boy. Totally not.



» Personality:

Pretty much every asshole-gamer stereotype rolled into one. He's obnoxious, arrogant, easily excited, hyperactive, ADD, twitchy, incredibly politically incorrect and insensitive, crude and filled with annoying game lingo ("pwned" "ragequit" "crits"), constantly breaking the 4th wall (though in the game, everyone does, e.g. referring to each other by their class names, etc.), whiny and demanding when he wants things (whininess and demandiness exponentially linked to how quickly or not he gets said thing), quick to insult and quick to anger and just as quick to forget about the whole thing as the next shiny thing comes along. He thinks he's the best thing since X-Box and probably the best thing since a long time before that, too, maybe like TV or guns or Zeus, even though all he remembers about Zeus is that he once turned into a goose and fucked a chick or something. But whatever, man, that's still pretty awesome. Not as awesome as himself, though, the strongest, fastest, most hardcore, coolest, most badass guy ever.

So anyway, Scout is a little delusional, and by a little delusional, I mean if confidence were a mental disorder he'd be in a straightjacket in a room with padded walls (probably bouncing off them, too). Though he's the most fragile character there is in the game, he's an offensive class and thinks of himself as a "people hurter" -- which he is most definitely not (or well, not compared to people like SOLDIER and HEAVY), as his only advantage is his amazing speed. He's reckless and childish, not helped by the knowledge that he's been shot, burned, stabbed, smashed, thrown out of buildings, sniped in the face, and all sorts of different kinds of MAIMED AND KILLED and lived (or well, survived) through it. And besides, he sort of HAS to be reckless and childish (and stupid, let's not forget stupid) because he's the one that's always running for his life past sentries and Snipers to capture flags or gather intel and whatnot. But oh yeah, if he hears anybody ELSE whining about being shot, burned, stabbed, smashed, thrown out of buildings, sniped in the face, and all sorts of different kinds of MAIMED AND KILLED? Pussies! QQ cry moar!

But yeah, it's pretty clear Scout's got a little obsession. With winning, with being the best, with feeling superior, and generally being the stereotypical manly man. It doesn't help that all the guys around him are bigger and tougher and older and more experienced and ALSO KIND OF BATTLE-CRAZY LIKE HE IS which means he's gotta step up the act a whole hell of a lot to compete. Stuff like fear and pain and worry and FEELINGS aren't things he'll ever readily admit to having (even if he's just been screaming and running or sobbing in a corner SHUT UP IT DIDN'T HAPPEN YOU BETTER NOT TELL NO ONE OR HE'LL KILL YOU, JERKASS) and he'll pretty much mercilessly mock every other guy who does (and by guy he means pussy, except by pussy he doesn't mean GIRLS, 'cause girls are different, they're GIRLS, they're supposed to cry and stuff, they don't count). And y'know that thing about how the loudest assholes are the most insecure? Well... WELL. He's not INSECURE about himself or anything, he's just -- just -- SHUT UP. He's the best, ok!? He's got a REP to protect.

He's a pretty big hypocrite, too, like you couldn't tell that from his obvious overdone show of manliness and badassitude. Like, he'll call people wusses and wimps for being in pain but is the class with least life in the game (or he is when he has his best weapon equipped, that is, and you just KNOW he lugs it around ALL THE TIME) and besides, he'll scream like a girl (OH GOD OH GOD OH MY GOD PAIN PAIN PAIN) if he's hit himself. He thinks he's as smooth and slick and experienced but is as honest as they come, mostly because he can't lie about anything actually IMPORTANT for shit (especially if you threaten it out of him -- just because he can TAKE pain doesn't mean he LIKES it, ok?) and besides, he's totally a virgin too (what, you couldn't tell? SHUT UP, it's not like he's never been ASKED, it's just -- oh god what if he MESSES UP and then she TELLS THE WORLD and then everybody LAUGHS at him and oh fuck you know what? he has this IMPORTANT MEETING TO GO TO BRB -- ps you never heard any of this). He'll trash talk freakin' everybody and insult them bluntly right to their faces, but it's nothing PERSONAL, y'know? He's just talking. And hit on something he actually cares about (his mom, for example) and -- well. WELL, even amazing awesome badasses like him care about SOME stuff too, 'kay? Jesus!

But -- y'know, he's just a dude. An awesome amazing badass dude who grew up in a world where everything is owned by two companies and war and (repeated) death is commonplace, but just a dude. He likes baseball (GO RED SOX!!!) and running and sports and kickin' back with his buddies after STUNNING VICTORIES OVER THE BLU TEAM WHERE HE KICKS SO MUCH ASS -- and then maybe trying to drink with them too but sorta failing 'cause he's a lightweight that gets drunk way too fast and then he babbles about how he likes gettin' letters from his mom and how he misses his dog but not his brothers, those assholes can all go to hell, how the hell do you think he learned to run so fast anyway? and how his teachers all used to say he was pretty smart before he quit school a while back to come here, like not smart-smart like he knew a lot, but real quick on the uptake, y'know? and how when this whole thing is over and they win ('cause they will, of course), he wants to go back and... and... he doesn't know, he kinda likes it here, he feels kinda appreciated and all paid-attention-to not like back home, y'know? and besides he kinda likes you guys --

Oh fuck, is Spy recording this? You fucking asshole! No homo! NO HOMO --



» Appearance:

Scout's animated. Not in the 3D sense -- well that, too -- but in the sense that his physical body is well, everywhere. All his movements and expressions are exaggerated and everything he feels is kinda shown all over his face -- nothing hidden here, seriously. His body moves too fast for him to think before it shows, and a lot of the time he acts all dramatic and shit for the attention or sarcastic value of it anyway.

He's a medium-height, light-weight, teenage guy. Long and lanky and built for speed. Blue eyes, hair that used to be real blond but darkened over the years. Dressed in pretty ordinary clothing: t-shirt (RED OF COURSE), pants, socks, sneakers (he's the only one on the team that doesn't wear boots. Too cool for that shit). Baseball cap always on his head 'cause he hates messing with his hair or anything (that's so gay) and handwraps for grip and the sheer badassery of handwraps. Don't question this, he's the master of badass.

Oh yeah, and his dog-tags on a chain around his neck, too. Which is badass, which he likes, but also practical, 'cause he's had his ENTIRE HEAD SHOT OFF or had his BODY CHARRED COMPLETELY BLACK or had his BODY PARTS GO EXPLODED EVERYWHERE BEFORE and all, they have to identify him somehow. PS none of that hurt a bit. At all!



SAMPLES
» "amatomnes" Entry:

The hell's all'a...

[There's a big blue eye in the middle of the screen when it clicks on. It draws back to show RED Scout from the shoulders up. He looks real confused for a second before he blinks and frowns. Somewhere in his head you can practically see the mental hamsters running in their wheels for a minute or two before Scout EXPLODES OUT OF THE BED HE'S SITTING IN as realization dawns and the memory of where he had just been comes back.]

YOU ASSHOLES!

[The communicator is grabbed by one of his hands and is shaken violently, turning the room into a dizzying blur.]

I WAS JUST ABOUT TA GET THE GUY WITH THE BRIEFCASE RIGHT INNA FACE, COULDJA HAVE PICKED A WORSE FREAKIN' TIME TA PULL YOUR DUMB GAY-JOKE --

[He rants on in this vein for a couple more seconds, then the screen stills again. Scout is now breathing kind of hard.]

Look man, this shit isn't funny, we got a freakin' war to win, ok? Port me back t'the map already. Or tell me where the porter is. C'mon!

[He's starting to look panicked at getting no response at all, and peers into the screen again.]

RED Scout to base, ya assholes hear me? This shit really isn't funny, guys...



» "amatomneslogs" Entry:

There's warm skin on his skin and oh, that's nice. It's not as soft as he'd thought it'd be, less pliant and y'know, squishy and stuff. But ok so maybe the chick isn't all curvy, he's still convinced she's really damn hot. Hot and warm and hard in all the right places, lots of stuff to press against, oh, shit.

And shit, the things she's doing with her hands, strong and firm and experienced and oh shit, she knows just where to touch and tease and grip to hold him down. Hold him down? Oh fuck yes, he loves a dominant woman, less work and worry for him to be doing, let her take the lead. And she IS, her mouth's making its way up his body, hot and wet --

And he bites down on his tongue as that mouth moves up, latching onto the side of his neck as that hand on him keeps working and oh god, this isn't going to take much longer. And her stubble brushes his cheek and he's turning his head to --

Wait.

WHAT.

The sheets fly off the bed in a flurry of white and Scout's shouting and shooting into a seated position, eyes wide and staring around at the unfamiliar room. That's not his main concern at the moment, however, and he doesn't even notice that he's somewhere else: once he realizes it was only a dream, he's too busy gaping down at himself in outraged shock and anger to wonder. Fuck, he's used to dreams like this, but -- fuck, fuck, not like that -- like stubble, who the hell could that even -- Spy, Sniper, Engie, Soldier, Medic, Heavy, Demoman, maybe even fuckin' PYRO -- FUCK, IS THAT EVERYONE?

He covers his face with his hands, curls into a ball, and just rocks there in mental agony for a long while, only looking up -- or well, down -- once, to spit a curse at his own penis.

"YOU FUCKING TRAITOR."

He's spent WAY too much time with the team.